Time Flies....tracking time with the help of Apps.

Time....it has always been a struggle for me. Typical of someone with Inattentive ADD I'm either too engaged and time gets away from me or not engaged so I'm distracted and yet again time slips by....

Me and My "Jekyll - Hyde" house!

As we all know the devil of MS is fatigue....mental and physical it can weigh you down like a vest full of lead. If a friend or family member comes to visit...they need look no farther than my living room to determine my level of fatigue.If I'm having some good days... things are nice and straight with maybe a good vacuum and dusting. But on days when I'm "1 day out from the flu" as I call it, you may find coats draped on the chairs dishes dotting the tables and dust. Early on my main task was to make sure everything was straight no matter the circumstances, my girls would find themselves with a grumpy lifeless mother who would be in bed "resting" at 7 pm. Now, I try to work more on my attitude and less on the housework. Don't get me wrong I like a nice clean house and still will hit the ground running when I'm up to it...but when I'm not up to it, I would rather save my energy for people not dust. I speak big but it's still a work in progress trying to relax when my kids bring someone over and not jump up and start straightening. My daughter pointed out that when I act uncomfortable about my house around her friends, they feel uncomfortable. I realized what a true statement that was when I thought a few classes I had in school where the person giving a talk was so uncomfortable it made me uncomfortable. So, my order to myself....is to chill out, relax and enjoy the people around me to the best of my ability. No more using up all my energy on cleaning....now I'm going to practice using more of that energy on the ones I love! Anyone else out there struggle with cleaning, energy and accepting a less than neat house?

Day 2:The Sound of Music....jammin' for energy

Before my separation around 8 months ago, I rarely listened to music. I didn't have an i-anything and my music would have to compete with the continuous litany of news from the TV or I always seemed to have someone in the car with me so music off...Mom/Wife ears on. But now....wow! Music is a source of inspiration, an energizer, and a relaxant. I have literally listened my way through pain, back spasms and nausea...I recently read an article about a fellow with MS who mentioned music therapy. I never thought of it in that sense but it has been a huge source of comfort! It helps that I now have my very own iphone and several apps that allow me to access the eclectic songs of my youth, ranging from Smokey Robinson to Rhianna. The former coming from the fact that I have two teenage daughters who have managed to let some 21st century songs work their way into my head and into my iphone. Brings me back to my teen years when music meant so much to me....that feeling slipped away....but now it's back and one of my best weapons against the daily insults of MS.

Day 1: An Object Not in Motion....

    Most of us have heard at one time or another " an object in motion stays in motion" and my mind would normally conjure up some type of weighted device continuing up and down once it was given a bit of a push from some unknown source. But now I'm trying to think of this theory in terms of myself and most people in the world for that matter. MS has a way of persuading some of us to stay more in the "not in motion phase" then the "motion phase" and for good reason. On my best day, I'm say "three or four days out from the flu" with other days ranging from my best case scenario to worst case scenario " the flu". Or, as those of us with MS or other chronic illnesses can attest...you can go from "four days out" to "one day out" all in the same day for good reason or no good reason. Now that we have established a small scale that I use to rate myself, maybe I should outline what my goal is for myself this blog and life for the next 365 days. My goal is acquire the habit of getting myself in motion on many different levels with the main goal being to finish this blog...you see I have a propensity to act like a bottle rocket on the fourth of July when it comes to ideas or projects. I shine "SOOO bright" in the beginning but than like a toddler surrounded by toys I wander off to the next big thing leaving a trail of unfinished ideas, projects, charts and grafts to be ground into a fine dust. Much later I will once again get hit by that same idea and reconstitute it into reality for a brief reunion. My seventeen year old daughter said that her manager of a local pizza place told her the key to happiness is " eat healthy, exercise and finish things". I guess I've never been happy! Seriously, I've been happy but I think to be able to harness ones creativity temporarily to create a finished product would be very satisfying indeed. I wouldn't know but "I've heard"! So, goal one; write every day! This should be interesting because although I enjoy writing and have had some success grade wise from it, I've never wrote unless made to write for school. I'm interested to see how this transpires through this next 365 days. If I do nothing I must finish this because I think it would really help me to feel like I could complete something I've set out to do over the long term. This is part of my plan to start myself in motion so I can stay in motion creatively, mentally and physically. So, after getting the idea and setting up the blog 14 days ago...I have officially set myself in motion! More tomorrow!